Today I’m pleased to share the wonderful honesty of Michele Fischer from Finding Your Voice and Big Dreaming Entrepreneur.
Tell us a little about your family
My family consists of me and my husband, our 14 month old daughter and a menagerie of fur kids that include 2 dogs and 4 cats.
Describe as best you can what kind of parenting style you use.
I am intuitive. I don’t follow any style as I found most parenting books annoying (I used to throw them across the room when I was pregnant) because I just felt they made things seem so impossible. EVERYTHING was a big deal (Oh no don’t paint the nursery pink because you will prejudice the child against other colors!!!). I personally look at my daughter and do what feels right. My husband and I both are followers of a loose routine and consider ourselves very adaptable.
What do you see your role is as a parent?
I consider myself to be more of a guide to letting her become the best person she is meant to be-whatever that is for her! I sit back and watch what interests her. For example like she LOVES books! She will sit with them and “read” them out loud to herself-so I buy her more books. Next week if she likes blocks I will foster that. It’s not about pushing something down her throat because a book or society says you should.
What has been the most difficult part of parenting for you and what helped you through this?
Dealing with extended family has been the biggest challenge. Suddenly family members we see 3 times a year wanted into our lives and I struggled with that. I love my time with those closest to me and am very protective of it. What helped me through it was just talking with my husband-A LOT and figuring out what worked for our family and how we could compromise to allow other people to be a part of our daughter’s life. It is an on-going adjustment.
What has been the most rewarding part of parenting?
Watching her learn, smile, explore. Knowing that I get to guide her on this journey is an amazing feeling.
Twenty years from now, looking back at yourself as a younger parent, what helpful message would you share with yourself?
What might you say to other parents?
My message to most parents is to remember that a “good” parent is a happy parent. We don’t have to be martyrs and there is no shame in saying “I can’t do this I need help.” If you are running ragged, exhausted and feeling as if you’re always sacrificing for your family-how are they going to feel? I would hate to think my mother gave up everything to raise me. I want my daughter to remember parents that enjoyed life as much as she does; parents who pursued dreams and hobbies, had meaningful friendship and knew how to not only take care of ourselves but her as well.
I often think of something I heard a long time ago. When you are on an airplane and the flight attendants are doing the safety instructions-they always say, “be sure to put on your oxygen mask before you try and help anyone else including small children.” Bottom line is if you can’t breathe, and you pass out what good are you to anyone? Same thing is true with being a parent. You need to care for your children and YOURSELF. After all kids learn much more by example.
In her own words . . .
I am a writer, coach, seeker and entrepreneur with a variety of interests. I dream big and jump tangents and love the whole process of creating!
Website: Finding Your Voice and Big Dreaming Entrepreneur
Facebook page: Finding Your Voice
“Writing is the only thing that when I do it,
I don’t feel I should be doing something else.”
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